Well now I've done it. I've gone ahead and scared a perfectly good acquaintance. I guess semi friend. I would say friend but she's my best friend's ex-roommate/enemy and so therefore I probably shouldn't be talking to her this much but she keeps on sending me updates on her new baby. Somehow I got sucked into some email chain and I'm on some distribution list for her life events and silly me actually responded congratulations to the email (just trying to enhance the karma a little...geesh).
Anyways to make a long story short we are emailing back and forth about the birth; c-section or not etc. when of course as I knew it would, it came. The age old question...and so are there any kids in you and your husband's future?
And so I had it you know, I just had it. I responded "well you know that's a very good question! We would certainly like to know!" I tried to not be sarcastic but seriously my hands just flew at the keyboard. It's not like she is a really good friend or anything and only my very good friends were told that I was even pregnant to begin with. But something just made me go off...and tell her the whole sad story how I lost the baby, saw that it had no heartbeat. Still trying...blah blah blah. And ended it with "so that's my story." I did apologize for being so blunt over email but explained that I was just sick of people asking. Which I'm sure didn't make things any better.
I'm bitter...bitter party of 1 (apparently since my husband shares none of my fears).
So I thought about it more and I really feel I still stand behind my email. I mean seriously, here's a little tip for people in general. There's really no reason to be asking the children question. Because listen, chances are if someone WANTS kids, and can HAVE kids, and isn't having ISSUES. Then guess what? You're going to see some friggen kids around. But if there are nooooooooooooo kids around then it either means a) they don't want kids (and so the question is null and void anyhow) b) can't have kids or c) is having problems. And if you're not man enough to handle b and or c then guess what?!!!! Don't friggen ask!
So that's my motto from now.
I don't care if people know I had a miscarriage (except for my work due to issues that could complicate my career (can't have the peeps know about the kids plan to early) but beyond that if you're asking chances are that I'm going to tell you and it's going to get awfully uncomfortable for you. And that's fine with me because I'm tired of being uncomfortable about this and making everyone else comfortable. I'm tired of playing the game...responding "oh we might" or "oh we are thinking about it." Helloooooooooo at my age no one is thinking about it ... they just haul ass and do it! So if it's not done...then guess what...there are issues! Issues that are none of your damn business! I'm telling you, this pregnancy thing is making me wiser by the minute.
Wait till someone asks how I'm feeling when I actually finally get pregnant. Can't wait to talk in detail about the constipation! Ugh.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment