Take 2, Scene 1...Sushinut Ala Bun

First off thank you so much for all your kind comments. And also your kind thoughts during my last rough patch. I really appreciate it :) The first thing I wanted to do when I got home from work today was post this so that I can share it with all my blogger friends, both lurkers and non :) Because I know you guys are right there with me understanding every fear, anxiety and thrill.

I'm still feeling like this is totally a dream...
I seriously can't believe this happened this month of all months. I am beyond elated! And as my husband says, cautiously optimistic :)

For the last few days as you have known I've been in a rut and had gone into frantic mode thinking that AFs timing would be horrendous and get in the way of a trip planned to visit my dad at the beginning of the year. It really pissed me off because as you know it's a pain to plan ANYTHING when you are TTC. For months I have had to put off a wine tasting weekend because of my cycle. It's just down right depressing to be planning to not do certain things and not be pregnant. If you were to be guaranteed pregnancy then of course you would give up anything...but after giving up everything each month for months on end, it really gets to you.

Anyways, I've basically been praying every night that AF will be delayed just one more day. FF.com basically said I was due to get AF like 2 days ago and then when I passed that day it moved it on me! I was like what the hell????? Is this how it is??? I'm like the cat chasing the mouse? So I decided this morning at 15 DPO or 13 DPO according to FF.com that I would test...solely on the whole progesterone plan. I had a pep talk with myself this morning that if my temps were still high I would test (in order to know if I should call my Dr. for the progesterone prescription - more on that later) ...if they weren't I wouldn't. Temp this morning was highest ever (not that this means anything since it's happened before) at 98.88.

So I cautiously made my way to the restroom, after rummaging around for a HPT, and almost used an OPK. My bathroom cabinets look like the Family Planning aisle at Wal*Greens with all the fertility friendly lubricants, OPKs and HPTs. It's like fertility or rather infertility threw up in there.

And wouldn't you know it a very faint line showed up! I seriously could not believe it! I was in complete awe. I kept on looking at it in different types of light. I even held it up in front of the mirror like I do with my OPKs. (My motto is if it shows up in the mirror and a decent distance away it's positive!)

I ran to my sleeping husband and shoved it in his half-asleep face, to which he said, "That's great honey!" Poor thing had to wake up to a pee stick shoved in his face. Oh well not like the cap wasn't on.

Then it was off to work unfortunately but a happy day it was :) We celebrated tonight by going out to sushi...although I didn't have anything raw. Just a veggie roll and a cooked shrimp roll for me...although I would gladly give up anything for a healthy pregnancy!

I know this takes me now to the next phase...which could be even more worrisome than the last phase (if that's even possible). Now the big test...can I take it to term. I know this is just the start of another episode of my journey...a journey that I hope lasts nine months. But for this week and this week only I'm going to let myself be the carefree pregnant woman I think I deserve to be. This week I'm vowing not to think of birth defects, and missed miscarriages...this week it's all about healthy normal pregnancies...because everyone deserves at least a week of that :)

I'm working on a post too to just re-cap all the things I did the same this cycle and things I did differently just because I'm anal like that in case I need to go back and study. So stay tuned for that if anyone is interested.