Drum roll...
2nd Beta = 25
(1st = 39)
Sigh. I have come to the realization that this baby has long vacated the premises and will not be with me for much longer.
It was really hard for me to hear that number but I can't say I was surprised. As my husband says (he has a medical background, although not in obgyn ... unfortunately...wow never thought I'd hear myself say that) we are lucky that it's not inching up little by little because that would probably mean it was ectopic. So at this point we are cautiously relieved that at least I'm not in jeopardy of losing a tube or something.
This morning I did get to the pharmacy before work and did purchase my progesterone. I also thought about possibly getting the beta numbers before doing that but the problem there was that the test results weren't due back until after noon. But the progesterone needed to be taken in the morning. I decided that in the long run if I did purchase the progesterone I would still be able to uses it next time around and even better would have it on hand so I wouldn't have to wait a day or two to get it from the doctor. So I went ahead and purchased it. But as soon as I administered it I knew it probably would be my last day since I had a lot of dark brown tissue on the applicator when I was done (sorry for the tmi).
Anyways, I was still spotting heavily dark brown but not feeling very many cramps which was good since my main goal was to get as much work done as possible. During lunch cramping started a little but I was okay. I ran to the drugstore picked up my prenatal vitamins and also some super duper thick maxi pads for later in the week so I wouldn't have to rely on my husband picking them up.
I then called my GP at the end of my lunch (since they are closed for lunch from 12-2p) and they didn't have the results yet but were willing to call the lab right then. They called a few minutes later to tell me the news and that I was to contact my obgyn. Yes thanks...I could have figured that out. Called my obgyn and told them the whole story ... AGAIN... but this time with the long awaited 2nd beta results. Meanwhile they said they just got the fax from my GP. They said they'd have the doctor look over my chart and call me tonight. Unfortunately I did not get a call back. So I'm calling tomorrow. At this point I just want to get a prescription for Tylenol Codeine and to just talk over options before I see her on Friday. She can run but she can't hide, because I'm coming in this Friday whether she likes it or not!
I've been going around and around in my head as to which I'd rather have. A D&C or miscarry at home. I think if I can I've now changed my mind to miscarrying at home. The main reason being that this will be my 2nd D&C in 6 months. What will that do to my uterine lining? Even if my doctor is careful? These are the things I want to get her opinion on. I also realize that by miscarrying at home I may not be able to get the remains tested but quite honestly I don't know how much there will be to test anyhow. Based on my hcg numbers either the levels started going down soon after they were going up...or maybe they never actually climbed meaning that the pregnancy never had a chance. I think I would feel differently if I had great hcg numbers, felt plenty of symptoms, was taking progesterone and saw the heart beat and then boom at 9 weeks lost it. I'd wonder what happened. But for this particular pregnancy I just think it was doomed from the beginning since hcg was an issue. What does everyone think? I'd love to know your opinions. Anyways as usual I'm just thinking out loud. If it's even an option I would still like to get the remains tested, who wouldn't if they could. But I can guarantee there's no way the results will come back "normal".
So the plan for tomorrow...is not to take Progesterone. I think my hcg levels speak for themselves and any progesterone taken will just be wasted. I'm also thinking that it might be hindering any movement down there. I would though like to get this on the move if possible sometime around Wed. Although if I can hang tight til Friday I can have an ultra sound to see exactly what is in there. Just to see what exactly I'm going to be passing. I wonder if there's any reason they would cancel my ultrasound. I still want it to see what's going on in there.
Well hopefully I can update more when I talk to the doctor tomorrow.
Thanks everyone for checking in...
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3 comments:
Hey sushilover,
I am so very sorry to hear this. You have had two sucker punches this year, and I am pissed. I am so mad and so sorry. It just sucks so bad.
I have waited to comment on the D&C/expectant management options b/c I was hoping there would be no need. I'll tell you my experience, since I took both options, in a way. I went in for my first appointment at what I thought was 10 weeks. Turns out, I had started spotting and mild cramping the day b/f the appointment, but thought it was that "normal" bleeding everyone says is nothing to worry about. When they did the ultrasound I saw nothing on the screen but a sac and a gray blob in it. They dated the sac at 5 W 5 days, which of coursed caused major panic in me..despite that two week gestation thing that always confuses me. Anyway, they said it was very possible everything was okay, my dates were off, and that in a few days we'd see some recognizable structures. So they took my beta/progesterone. The next day they put me on suppositories since my prog was only 10 and my beta was seemingly okay (9700). The next scan was inconclusive..only the sac had grown. By this point I knew it was over. The next blood draw showed HCG at 7200, so it was confirmed. I had to stop the progesterone immediately b/c that progesterone is what keeps the uterine lining in place. They said to go home over the weekend and that I would probably experience some pretty severe cramping and bleeding, but wouldn't need any pain meds...I guess b/c I wasn't that far along. And I got the typical "if you have to change a pad more than once in 2 hours you are bleeding too much..give us a call." So that weekend I had what was like a heavy period and more cramps than i've ever had during a period. By Monday, the bleeding was the heaviest (3 days after falling hormones were documented), and lots of large, globular, clotted blood. No tissue or anything. By wednesday the bleeding slowed, I had no cramps, but I still needed pads. My doctor's office requested I go in on Thursday ( a week after my second scan) to take another beta to be sure my hormones were going back to zero. I told them I was still bleeding, and they said if it had not stopped by Monday to come back for another u/s. It had not stopped, and when they did the u/s the entire sac was still in there, just moved down closer to the cervix. WTF?? Apparently my body had tried, but not quite expelled it. I had no cramps after that first weekend. So they waited another 2 days, and when my HCG leveled off at 2000 and stopped falling, I went for a D&C. Basically, 14 days of waiting for the body to do its thing, and then the D&C. I was not thrilled about the D&C, but at this point I was so tired and mad about the situation. I grilled my OB about how gentle he would be..no hard scraping,etc. He assured me he'd be careful..and that it was a suction with a light scraping. (I should also mention here that my close friend had a D&C after a miscarriage, but the doctor did not get all of it out so she had to take a contraction-inducing drug at home and lay on the couch for two days to expel what was left..so I was worried abou that also). I did not want a large tube in my throat (my friend ended up with an ulcerated throat from being intubated..she was 10 weeks along) and b/c I was early they said all I needed was a small tube in my nose and down my throat. I also asked about local anesthesia, but they said they don't recommend it for two reasons: the noise of the suction, and the uncomfortable position you have to be in. That was a month ago. The D&C went fine. I had no pain afterwards and just regular bleeding like a period afterwards. They had me take 5 doeses of methergin (sp?) to help the uterus contract down and squeeze out any bleeding. I didn't really have any cramps associated with that even though they said I would. My hormones must have gone back below 12.5 within two weeks b/c I took one of those sensitive pregnancy tests and got a negative. Exactly 28 days after the D&C I got a period.
I'm giving you all these details b/c ultimately there are pros and cons for any route you choose: the drugs at home (possibly painful), the expectant management (may take a while for your hormones to fall and for your body to get it out), and D&C(risks of scarring or the doctor not getting it all). You can always pick a combination of the three by trying to wait at home and letting them monitor your homones closely, which will require a trip back to the OB once per week (this may upset you when you have to see all the pregnant women in the waiting room). Then if things don't happen quickly enough, you can try the other two options. I feel that it is probable they will do the ultrasound on Friday to see how much is there and you'll have a clear picture of what you want to try. And as someone else commented earlier, every m/c is different.
I am so sorry for the pain and frustration you are experiencing. I cannot imagine having to experience this twice. Hopefully you can spend some time talking with the OB Friday on what happened here and perhaps they'll agree to run some basic tests. BTW, my diagnosis was blighted ovum. I hope that you get all the medical answers you need, and the medical part of this goes as well as it can. I know your emotions are taking the hardest blow. My prayers are with you and your husband.
I am so so sorry. Even though you sound like you have wrapped this idea around your head and are as "prepared" as you can be, losing any pregnancy or even a hint of a pregnancy is still very hard.
Falling betas is a great sign that your body is doing what it needs to. My betas just kept going up for a week even after I knew there was no heartbeat so that is great news.
Keep that progesterone in a good, safe place. It WILL come to good use soon. Tylenol/Codeine is a great idea too.
In terms of natural vs surgery. It is such a personal choice. I chose surgery both times because my body never got the clue to do anything natural at all. With #1 it had been 3 weeks and nothing. With #2 I demanded to get everything tested since my scenario really encompassed what you wrote about (8 weeks, saw heartbeat, ect). My doc recognized my concerns with multiple D&C procedures and she was very informative and help reassure me that 2 was okay. She gave me Misoprostol (200mg which is 1/4 of the normal dose for a miscarriage) and it did the trick. Maybe you might consiider that since you:
a) can plan exactly when it will happen
b) get kick ass pain meds to take
C)can be assured you can do this at home.
Perhaps what you can do is try to hang tight until Friday, get the ultrasound and maybe either take some meds to induce the miscarriage or have surgery Saturday morning....or you can always wait it out since your betas are so low, I bet something will happen soon.
I agree with you on the testing part too. Both of your miscarriages seem different enough and this one seemed so early that it may be a waste of testing, chances are whatever you bring in will be your tissue....
Maybe we need to add some vodka to our smoothie date ;)
I don't have advice on what to chose, it really stinks that you are even having that conversation with yourself.
Hopefully your OB can give you some guidance and a good dose of pain meds.
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