Almost 20 week update

Let's see, what has happened since my last post...

I had a follow up with my obgyn at the 2 week mark after the amnio and the nuggets were still alive and well. So that was good news. Although I'm still clinging to the lovely Dec. 10th date in my head that marks one month after the amnio, which is pretty much the clearance I've heard for complications. Hopefully there are none because I've gone ahead and told my staff at work of the news. They were all very excited and everyone is trying to help with names. So I'm sort of out of the closet at work but not completely because I don't plan on telling anyone else except close friends...so it will just have to be word of mouth or if you will "word of stomach". I'm not really hiding it anymore but not really flaunting it if you know what I mean. I still owe some of those bump hiding style pics I promised.

Oh and I should mention that (Yay!) my obgyn and I definitely agreed to do a c-section on the nuggets because the chances of them both being in the right position are close to nil. I'm completely fine with this because since day one I've always wanted a c-section. My mother had two and she's always told me it's the way to go. I know there are pros and cons to it but I feel the same way about vaginal child birth. I guess I feel safer having them extracted from me rather than relying on my body doing the right thing. Must be the fact that my body didn't quite do the right thing from the beginning. And I don't trust it. So I'm very excited about this and we've even set an early date because she said they will most likely be ready to come out about 3 weeks early. So my set c-section is scheduled for the last Friday of March. They might come earlier but definitely not later. As a mega planner this is fabulous planning news for me. Gives me a clear goal.

I also had a follow up appt. with the perinatologist to check on my cervix and I'm happy to report my cervix is buttoned up and holding strong. I asked if I needed to have regular check ups about this and he said no. Seems like if your cervix is closed it's closed I guess. He just wanted to check me to make sure I wasn't ready to deliver in the next few weeks. Next few weeks! What a thought! I can't even imagine. It will be another month before I have another ultrasound appt. with both my obgyn and perinatologist so that will be a challenge in patience.

I'm feeling a bit more kicking from the little ones and the ironic thing is that although I'm very happy to feel them I also wonder if I'm hurting them by sitting up right or scrunching my tummy in a way to not give them enough room.

The other weird thing I've felt is this strange protectiveness towards them while revealing their existence. The night before I was going to tell my staff about them I had this disturbing dream about not wanting to tell anyone about them in order to protect them. I honestly don't really enjoy telling friends about them because then I feel they are open to the world and unprotected. I know in my head this makes no sense at all but I just can't get over it. It's very very strange. I guess I just want to keep them to myself.

Well tomorrow is Thanksgiving and we will be showing up with bump in tow to my inlaws. They don't know anything yet so it should be fun. I think I'll probably pull together all my ultrasound pics in a book and show my mother in law...she should enjoy that being a mom herself. I'll post some when I get a chance too.

We definitely have a lot to be thankful this thanksgiving. It's a far cry from last year's thanksgiving that's for sure. Last year I remember thinking that I quite honestly didn't have much to be thankful for with just 1 miscarriage down and no bfp's in sight. It was a very low time for us. Ironic how much can change in a year...it's been a long haul. I hope everyone has a good thanksgiving no matter what your situation is happy or disappointing this year. Just know that if it is a disappointing one, all could be different 1 year from now. And that's certainly something to look forward to.